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Sunday 21 December 2014

A MUST READ: 25YRS OF MARRIAGE NO CHILD MY STORY - ADEBIMPE JIBADE

When Mrs Adebimpe Jibade tied the nuptial knot with Akinbode Jibade on the 22nd of October 1988, little did she know that the relationship would end up in this bizarre state.

They had courted for about a year and decided to make the relationship a lasting one by sealing it with the union of marriage which they professed to uphold till death do them part, in sickness and in health. However, the story today is far from that anticipated beginning, as Akinbode is threatening fire and brimstone that if Deborah his wife of twenty five years does not go far away from him and out of his life in one piece, he is going to ensure that peace is far from her.

While speaking with Daily Times, 45 year old Adebimpe amidst tears disclosed how she had been forced to get married at an early age of barely twenty and how her once loving and caring husband suddenly became a monster who is now threatening to kill her if she dares come close to him.


In an interview with our correspondent, Adebimpe narrated how her husband of a silver jubilee threw her out of the house some months ago saying that she was the one who has been tying down his destiny for all the years they have been married.

“The whole trouble started offin February when I lost a five month old pregnancy. I woke up that morning feeling dizzy and very tired and so I decided that I will not go to the shop where I operate a hair dressing salon. I was home and suddenly, I started feeling pains in my tummy. I called him since I was the only one at home. He came and took me to the hospital. By the time we got to the hospital, the inevitable happened; I was bleeding and after a few tests, the doctor announced that I have lost the pregnancy. Not again! I felt shattered, as if my whole world just collapsed.

As I looked into my husband’s eyes, I knew there was trouble. He did not even let me get home before he told me right there and then, that I should not bother coming home because my homecoming is of no use. I felt like dying right there and then”

“True to his words” continued Adebimpe “Akinbode did not allow me entry into the house. He changed the lock to the house and went out. I waited endlessly for him that night, but he never returned; I slept in front of the door. I called his phone but he didn’t pick my calls. I knew I was doomed”
Adebimpe narrated how he came back and threatened to kill her if she dares try to come into his house.

“He started shouting and ranting at me that he knew I was going to lose that pregnancy again that I am the witch that has been tying down his destiny all these while and that I have been eating up all our children. Poor me, I didn’t have anywhere in Lagos where I could go because my aunt whom I was staying with lives in Ibadan. I ran to one of his relatives who lives in Bariga who is like a father to him, Alhaji Bakare to explain the situation of things to him and the following day, they were at our house but still, Akinbode did not allow me entry into the house. He told Alhaji that everywhere he went to for prayers, he was told that I am the one who is holding his destiny and has been the one killing all our babies and he is not ready to continue with the marriage anymore. Despite Alhaji’s pleas, he refused to let me in; I had to sleep the night in Alhaji’s house before going back to Ibadan the following day to meet my relatives.

Ever since then he had not looked back, instead, he packed the remaining of my belongings and brought them to my aunt’s place leaving a stern warning that if I dare come near his house, he would kill me.”

Reminiscing on the past and what led her into the marriage that had led to this nightmare, Adebimpe recalled.
“Because of the harsh background I had, being an orphan, I resigned my fate into marriage with high hopes that finding a responsible man to settle down with will help me escape from poverty and the harsh treatment I was getting from my aunt and my cousins whom I was living with. Little did I know that I was going to face another challenge beyond me. We courted for about a year before getting married”
After the marriage, Adebimpe had looked forward to a happy life that will be blessed with children to call her own but fate had a twist on her as children eluded her and she kept holding hope while keeping faith. About two years into the marriage, respite came when she became pregnant and was delivered of a baby boy. However, that joy was short-lived.

“After almost two years of marriage, God blessed us with a baby boy and I was happy and felt at last, I found my second, my own child and blood. I was still basking in this joy when tragedy struck and little Keji died eight months after he was born. I almost went mad. I cried myself to stupor wondering why I have to be going through all this. My husband was so sad.”

With the hope that things will get better with time and that God will show mercy and make her pregnant again,
Adebimpe gradually snapped out of her gloom and looked forward to what life has to give.

According to her, she became pregnant six months later but lost the pregnancy three months after.

“Six months after the loss of my baby, I got pregnant again but after three months, I lost the pregnancy. We did all manner of fertility, and medical tests and in all we were told that there is nothing wrong with both of us and that we have the ability to parent a child. If I have to count since then, I have lost more than fifteenpregnancies at different intervals and the last one was in February. I am so tired of life and don’t even know what to do or believe anymore. It is as if there is someone who is secretly hiding in the dark to eat up all my babies. Several times, his relatives had told him to take a second wife but he kept saying no, may be now he is ready to take a second wife but at least he wouldn’t have treated me this way. I cannot stop him from trying, after all, Yoruba proverb says that it is one child’s head that will call the others. Who knows if taking a second wife will even make way for me too but now he doesn’t even want me to stay. It is so sad” she said trying hard to hold back the hot tears from rolling down her cheeks.

In a telephone conversation with Daily Times, Akinbode annoyingly said that he was not interested in discussing anything related to Adebimpe because she is evil and has been the one behind his woes all along and will not have anyone discuss her with him.

“Please I don’t know you and I don’t want to have any discussion about Adebimpe. She is evil and she is a witch and I will not have a woman like that live with me anymore. Please don’t call me into her matter ever again please!” he said hangingup.

For Adebimpe, life since that time has been gloomy as she keeps praying that one day, God will visit her and make her a mother of a living child.


Culled from Daily Times

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